I really have no words. I lost my loving father today and I’m trying to figure out how I feel and how to process. It’s difficult being so far away and not being in Manila to hold my mom and grieve with her as well as all my siblings who are all over the place. So here I am alone and reminiscing about the great times I had with my dad.
A few weeks ago, our family had the privilege of being able to go and visit my dad in Manila. I’m so grateful I had a chance to spend time with him and let him know how much he meant to me. I was able to resolve the past and be completely present with him. We had a moment of pure, authentic, connection that I will cherish in my heart forever. I had the opportunity to pray over him and thank my Heavenly Father for my earthly one. It was quite special and surreal. In my previous post, I talk about resolving and mending relationships. This to me is the most important part of our health. Our heart health is what drives our bodies to complete health. Our emotional eating, stress, anxieties, worry, fear, chronic illnesses, can and have been attributed to not dealing with emotions. Even cancer has been known to thrive and flourish in unforgiveness. Grief is undelivered communications. Being present and in the moment is the key. When you live in the past, or live in the future, you cannot enjoy your present.
So even though I’m heartbroken from the passing of my dad, I feel complete and healed because of the time we had together. I encourage you to dig deep and start dealing with your emotional health. Here’s a great resource that can get you started. Grief Recovery is an amazing program because they actually give you tools on completing your grief. I won’t be able to explain it and do it justice, just trust me and check out their site. Grief Recovery. See if they have a class near you.
Actually, being with my dad during his last days gave me the courage and the fuel to go after my dreams. I’ve had an idea brewing for a while and I’m really excited about doing it. Being with someone in their last days reminded me that I’m not promised tomorrow. Whatever desire or dream God put on my heart needs to be gone after. Even this morning, there were some lightbulbs that went off and it felt like my dad’s guiding hand to tell me that he’s with me and that he supports me. So, I dedicate this next phase of my life to my dad. I know you will be happy to know that you raised someone who is not afraid to reach their dreams. Thank you for being my dad and for loving us so much. I love that my dad really loved my husband. He really adored Erik and that makes me happy. God knows I brought home lots of frogs before my prince charming:) I’m sure my dad was grateful.
In the spirit of authenticity, I will continue to give of myself in the most transparent and vulnerable way. I think that is the gift of humanity. I want to be able to share my griefs, victories, defeats, failures, and complete joys. I know it’s tough and I want to be strong but really, strength comes from being real. Thank you guys for supporting our family during this challenging time.
If you are in Los Angeles, please go and support the Zumba Fundraiser that’s being held in honor of my dad next Saturday, August 17th. There will be a host of Zumba instructors that will give you your money’s worth! Please continue to pray for our family and if you are able, any donation would be appreciated for medical fees.
If you can’t make it, you can donate here….